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[bighairedmike]

He's right you know...

[(S)ALTY]

He's right you know...

.... and with what did Dear Henry fix it with ? .......    

[Dougals Dad]

Are you ready....after 3
1....2.....3

There's a hole in the bucket,
Dear Liza, dear Liza
There's a hole in the bucket,
Dear Liza, there's a hole.

Then fix it, dear Henry,
Dear Henry, dear Henry
Then fix it, dear Henry,
Dear Henry, fix it.

With what shall I fix it,
Dear Liza, dear Liza?
With what shall I fix it,
Dear Liza, with what?

With a straw, dear Henry,
Dear Henry, dear Henry
With a straw, dear Henry,
Dear Henry, with a straw.

But the straw is too long,
Dear Liza, dear Liza
But the straw is too long,
Dear Liza, too long

Then cut it, dear Henry,
Dear Henry, dear Henry
Then cut it, dear Henry,
Dear Henry, cut it.

With what shall I cut it,
Dear Liza, dear Liza?
With what shall I cut it,
Dear Liza, with what?

With an axe, dear Henry,
Dear Henry, dear Henry
With an axe, dear Henry,
Dear Henry, an axe.

The axe is too dull,
Dear Liza, dear Liza
The axe is too dull,
Dear Liza, too dull

Then sharpen it, dear Henry,
Dear Henry, dear Henry
Then sharpen it, dear Henry,
Dear Henry, sharpen it.

With what shall I sharpen it,
Dear Liza, dear Liza?
With what shall I sharpen it,
Dear Liza, with what?

With a stone, dear Henry,
Dear Henry, dear Henry
With a stone, dear Henry,
Dear Henry, a stone.

The stone is too dry,
Dear Liza, dear Liza
The stone is too dry,
Dear Liza, too dry

Then wet it, dear Henry,
Dear Henry, dear Henry
Then wet it, dear Henry,
Dear Henry, wet it.

With what shall I wet it,
Dear Liza, dear Liza?
With what shall I wet it,
Dear Liza, with what?

With water, dear Henry,
Dear Henry, dear Henry
With water, dear Henry,
Dear Henry, with water.

How shall I get it,
Dear Liza, dear Liza,
How shall I get it,
Dear Liza, how shall I?

In the bucket, dear Henry,
Dear Henry, dear Henry
In the bucket, dear Henry,
Dear Henry, in the bucket.

There's a hole in the bucket.

[thegazelle]

Thats stupid that is why dont they just go to B and Q

[York Alty]

B & Q?

In 1970?

[Dougals Dad]

Percy Rooks in Timperley!*







As seen on Frank Sidebottom's Fantastic Shed Show!

[(S)ALTY]

               

Bloody marvellous !

When does your summer season in Llandudno start J D ?

Roll on August when sanity returns !

[Jacko]

.

The letter now on line www.thisistrafford.co.uk

I WRITE to ask Alty FC to get their act together when collecting funds to ‘save our Squad’ next season.

As a season ticket holder for 10 years I have enjoyed the cut and thrust that is Blue Square football.

My bone of contention is the half-time SOS bucket collection.

This is collected by a bunch of enthusiastic youngsters who follow one another around, similar to an u10 football team who have no understanding of spreading out and passing the ball.

These lads, likewise, do an excellent job in missing vast numbers of fans who would otherwise be happy to throw loose change into a bucket.

By the time you realise that they are close by and you find your change, they have moved on. No amount of ‘hey, hold on a moment’ will bring them back.

During the close season is a perfect time for them to sort out their tactics, so that next season those involved can make a sensible contribution to the club funds.

Thereby helping Alty FC to achieve the glory it richly deserves.

Desmond Nockin, Brooklands

what a cod!!!!